Narcissists are people who believe themselves to be the center of the universe and the people around them mere acolytes to serve them These parents view their offspring only as extensions of themselves rather than as individuals Here is the first book to explore the private struggle of adults who were raised by narcissistic parents.
Trapped in the Mirror Adult Children of Narcissists in Their Struggle for Self Narcissists are people who believe themselves to be the center of the universe and the people around them mere acolytes to serve them These parents view their offspring only as extensions of themselve
You know you re an idiot I m talking to the face in the mirror If you haven t already decided that I am indeed an idiot, some of you may now be thinking that a narcissistic parent is responsible for my powerfully self hating negative inner parent 55 also known, by those who worship at Our Lady of Jargon, as negative introject 55 Well, forget about my poor old mother, who happens to be narcissistic and accept this explanation for my self deprecation I bought Elan Golomb s book I spent bucks on a [...]
The idea that this author is in any way justified in writing a book on healing or conquering narcissism is laughable The book is filled with countless examples of her own insanity like the time she cracked her skull and insisted on seeing an Eastern meditative healer instead of a doctor Of course, her parents intervention was proof of their narcissism.This is a fascinating topic but an awful book Most of the anecdotes come from group therapy that she ATTENDED instead of led The book bills itself [...]
I would say this is fundamentally the most painful book I ve ever read as it hit me so personally about my own upbringing The truths about the particulars that children of narcissists suffer are a daily struggle for me What a wonderful gift that Golomb has given even if not every idea works for you, it gives a group of very lost souls a means to navigate the emotional holocaust that is so often at play.
I found various insights worth noting here and there but I became too bored with the content to continue after I d read 50% of the book I won t be picking it up again and officially put it on my DNF pile.The delivery of the text is pretty dry and the book is organized in a way I didn t like As the authors explains the characteristics of a narcissist and the different behavior profiles that manifest in their children she continually inserts herself into the text, I , me , my friend , my lover , e [...]
Another first I picked this book up before lunch, and read it through my meal, sat in the car reading in my parking lot, and now have finished it in my favorite reading chair, without taking off my coat There are a couple of reviews I read here that are my reactions as well The book is cross eyed hard to get into, but I think this is because the subject matter is difficult, especially for someone who had narcissistic parents There s not much sense to be had in that brand of childhood But the wor [...]
I m giving up on this one half way through What I hoped would be an exploration of adult manifestations of surviving or trying to survive a narcissistic family system or parent , is actually an inarticulate series of caricatures of destructive individuals that, despite the reality of their situations, seem like titillating psyhco drama than explanatory case studies Golomb manages to be both flippant and melodramatic, all the while making sweeping generalizations but failing to present applicabl [...]
This is one deep and heavy book which forces one to look into the deep recesses of one s soul in order to wrestle with the damage familial pedagogy causes In retrospect, we re all innocent and we re all to blame but instead of voicing the blame, shame, and guilt, we should recognize our introjected parents and realize that nobody can make us feel a certain way we are our own person and we re in charge of our lives Before I could reason, I was indoctrinated into a cult, Christian Science, and as [...]
I m torn between three and four stars So many of the descriptions of certain emotions behaviors in this book were so exacting for me that I wanted to pull out a highlighter, just to make the point abundantly clear to myself people who know me and the way I treat books will be shocked at this urge and will not be surprised to know that I resisted the highlighter The confirmation of these emotions and actions and why I experience them is illuminating and gratifying On the other hand, many of the o [...]
Poorly organized, lacking in any clinical rigor, and simply troubling at times This book was a hot mess Given the author s creds, I thought this would have some research or scientific rigor behind it Nope It was much akin to a memoir as it gave anecdotes from her own life along with many of her friends and colleagues There is no doubt that the people featured in this book have endured rejection and pain at the hands of their parents, however it wasn t clear how much of it was due to narcissisti [...]
I agree with those that found Trapped in the Mirror difficult going and time consuming to read because of the fact that it hits so close to home I also agree that Golomb s tangents don t always work and are sometimes cumbersome She reaches in all directions with her comparisons, to her own dreams, and once to a Mobius strip it gets a bit sprawling.But sometimes this manner really works for me, and allows me to remember experiences I ve had myself, but through incorporating both intellectual and [...]
Recommended to me by my therapist An excellent treatise on the influence of narcissistic individuals in those for whom abuse and negativity feels like normal behavior than dysfunction The author is a well educated clinical psychologist who herself is the child of two narcissistic parents Adeptly weaving her experiences with those of her friends, patients, and other individuals, she helps us to recognize the thought patterns and unintentional, automatic reactions to challenges that everyone face [...]
This is a very interesting book It should be noted that every person is multifaceted, and reading this book gave me glimpses of insight into my own experiences throughout my life While no one experience listed here fits perfectly into my own pattern growing up, there are shadows of patterns that I learned a tremendous amount from It took me a little while to get through this book because it was very thought provoking for me There are occasional swear words, so if you re sensitive to thatybe 3 or [...]
For any child who has grown up in a home with narcissistic parents, this book provides real insight to the family dynamics that can create damage that lasts for a lifetime Recommended by my therapist,Trapped in the Mirror allowed me to look from the outside in and understand about my own family dysfunction.
The first half was useful The second half started to veer off into stories that got and far off the beaten path So I m stopping at 67% I m glad I read this I needed it I learned a lot about myselfchokengtitik
titikchokeng 28 The narcissistic parent s principle, You don t count, means the child s effort to be seen as an individual is worthy of consideration, if only for trying to understand that her problems are felt by the parent to be an act of treason The child s move toward autonomy is gr [...]
This book was given to me by a friend who thought it was great It didn t live up to my expectations at all This is not a thoughtful piece of academic literature written by an expert in the field It s definitely not a clear, thoughtful path to self healing It s a psychologically damaged woman writing about her scarring childhood and exposing the problems of her friends and relations as supporting evidence of her own personal theories Some of the conclusions are just incredulous A narcissistic mot [...]
While you ll find the occasional insight in this book, they are few and far between, and aren t anything you couldn t find in the multiplicity of online support groups for survivors of abusive parents Further, these insights are buried so far beneath sedimentary layers of bad clinical practice, conjecture, countertransference, and bigotry racism, homophobia transphobia, fatphobia, sex negativity , that it s not worth the time or energy to read the book and unearth them As a mental health profess [...]
This book was interesting I read it because my stepdaughter asked me to She said that in her opinion, her mother is a narcissist and the book is geared for the adult children of people with this condition It makes me compassionate as my stepdaughter has had many life problems which my husband and I have helped her with repeatedly She is now doing well holding a job, living on her own It gives an interesting and a bit disturbing view of what her childhood may have been like and why some of her c [...]
This book is self serving to the author You can tell, and she even mentions, that she wrote it for herself, to deal with her narcissistic father Because of this, you read personal accounts of her life Which, at times, are off putting, but mostly, they are beneficial It is striking how similar narcissists are I recommend this book to anyone who had a narcissist parent.
Insightful, personal, scientific, and deeply relatable delving into the reasons, motivations, consequences, and recovery related to being the child of a narcissistic parent I m stunned this author has not written She s shockingly personal while maintaining scientific fervor.
Disarming the Narcissist was useful in terms of what to do when you have identified a narcissist in your life Trapped in the mirror seemed like it was just a series of stories about narcissists.
Helpful information if you ve ever lived with a narcissist person.
Written by a psychologist who had a narcissistic father Helpful information and insight into how to recover from living with one or narcissistic parents.
It is useful and insightful if you are delving into your self and has a personal history of disfunctional families.
this book is written for adult children of narcisstic parents.
This book was very healing to read I admire the author a lot for her generosity on so many levels in the writing of this book.
Fabulousally fabulous book on such a difficult subject Helped me a lot.
This book is annoying the crap out of me I m the child of a narcissist and I don t find narcissism around every corner and in every person I meet I m sure as hell not a complete victim or have endless addictions I survived my life with mom narcissism, paranoia and obsessive compulsive disorders intact and fully engaged I ll be thankful to be done with this My therapist thought it would be comforting Ha If I met the author or any of her case studies, I d hightail it to the nearest bleak desolate [...]
This book touched on some good thoughts about growing up as the child of a narcissist Overall the book increased my self awareness of my own struggles, particularly with perfectionism I was struck by many similarities between my own childhood and the experiences depicted in the book However, the author s tone was at some points discouraging and unnecessarily gloomy I disagreed with many of her opinions, and I don t feel that recovery is as difficult as she would make it out to be I also disagree [...]
Finding a book that clearly and concisely helps the child of a narcissistic parent understand their experience is a daunting task I have read many this book is another Writing one must be challenging There are flaws in the structure of the book I m not sure that it was the most effective way to organize the information by blending clinical observations with the author s own personal history, making the conclusions weaker from the perspective that the reader might doubt the authors ability to be [...]
This was a difficult read, partially because of the style of the writer and partially because sections of it felt like a kick in the gut I saw myself mirrored in many stories and patterns, which was uncomfortable and sometimes made me quite nauseous At times, the author comes across as a whiner stuck in a loop of negative story telling I imagine the process of writing and revisiting the topic from her own life to write this book served as a healing balm so I had to get to a point of just letting [...]